As a baby of the 70’s, a kid of the 80’s, teen of the 90’s and Fully fledged (ISH) adult at the turn of the century, life has moved fast and emotionally evolved even faster. As technology boomed, so did our ability and acceptance to share emotion.
Gone are the days of the eighties, when we sucked that sad fucker up and put on brave face and held in mental and physical abuse. Where divorce was unacceptable, physical bruises were covered by clothing and mental trauma doused in alcohol, narcotics and silence.
As a product of childhood trauma, in a time when where there was no support for my parents, no voice for me to shout with, and no platform to speak up or find help. We were all left floundering. Our choices were either the adult “loony bin” with a splashing of straight jackets and padded walls, or the children’s ward of a General Hospital who were used to fixing the physical wound not the mental one. WELCOME to 1986.
30 years later and the evolution has come full circle. We are no longer a vast pit of shame and secrets, we are now a spewing dragon of emotional over sharers, yes you may include me in this. I used to share to garner some understanding and solidarity. To provide some acceptable “let out” for people who hide. This is no longer needed, because whatever you struggle with, as does many. Do not get me wrong this is wonderful, but we have come to a point where your emotions are trivialized, as everyone actively voices them, and this can pick at a wound that now may never heal due to uninterest.
Social Media as a platform for sharing is amazing. But, it can also be very damaging and minimalizing. I mean these days we all have an eating disorder, anxiety, childhood trauma, PTSD, experienced abuse, been divorced, lost someone and the world knows. Yes this is all awful, I am not demeaning or diminishing pain, with that sentence. However in the age of expression now your pain is the same as everyone else’s. You are not some special, wild, damaged artist, who stands on their golden stage of painful glory. Instead you are mundane and forgotten, forgotten when you really need to be cared for, probably more so now than ever. Social media creates a circle of me me me oblivious to those around you.
Then we have the next layer of emotional destruction, enter stage right the “snappy” “positive” slogan. We are slowly suffocating in their zippiness of “you’ve got this”!?! “No I fucking have not! Usually posted by someone who is trying tp convince themselves, they feel fabulous and are all fixed, or they are charlatans of true emotion. Attempting to creating layers so they too have a tragic story to tell. People want to be included, people want to be the same as everyone else, that is why people join groups, go to church etc ? Harsh, but true?
Yes we all love a upbeat saying, but not every second of damn day. Shit people it’s ok to wallow, it is ok to be sad, and if I am feeling like that, not one single pretty painted post will make me feel better. A hug will, or an ear that listens. Sadly, over emotional sharing, means we actually stop listening and reflecting. I truly feel like the world shut it’s ears to pain, it just became too overwrought in its own issues. People now apologize for sharing their thoughts and feelings, exactly as they did 100 years ago. Back then, they did not want to seem weird, these days they do no want to add to another persons personal trauma.
Full circle, still no one listens.